baby joke15

The Layette
1st baby: You pre-wash your
newborn's clothes, color-
coordinate them, and fold them
neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make
sure that the clothes are clean
and discard only the ones with
the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink,
can't they?

baby joke14

Preparing for the Birth
1st baby: You practice your
breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother
practicing because you
remember that last time,
breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an
epidural in your 8th month.

baby joke13

Being a parent changes
everything. But being a parent
also changes with each baby.
Here are some of the ways
having a second and third child
is different from having your
first.
Your Clothes
1st baby: You begin wearing
maternity clothes as soon as
your OB/GYN confirms your
pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your
regular clothes for as long as
possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes
ARE your regular clothes.

joke12

Deep In the back woods of
Tennessee, a hillbilly's wife went
into labor in the middle of the
night, and the doctor was called
out to assist in the delivery. Since
there was no electricity, the
doctor handed the father-to-be
a lantern and said, "Here. You
hold this high so I can see what
I am
doing." Soon, a baby boy was
brought into the world.
Whoa there, said the doctor,
"Don't be in such a rush to put
that lantern down. I think
there's another one coming."
Sure enough, within minutes he
had delivered a baby girl. "Hold
that lantern up, don't set it
down there's another one!" said
the doctor.
Within a few minutes he had
delivered a third baby.
"No, don't be in a hurry to put
down that lantern, it seems
there's yet another one
coming!" cried the doctor.
The redneck scratched his head
in bewilderment, and asked the
doctor, "You reckon it might be
the light that's attractin' 'em?

baby joke11

Swallowing Coins
1st child: when first child
swallows a coin, you rush the
child to the hospital and demand
x-rays.
2nd child: when 2nd child
swallows a coin, you carefully
watch for coin to pass.
3rd child: when 3rd child
swallows a coin you deduct it
from his allowance!

baby joke10

At Home
1st baby: You spend a good bit
of every day just gazing at the
baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of
everyday watching to be sure
your older child isn't squeezing,
poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit
of every day hiding from the
children.

baby joke9

Going Out
1st baby: The first time you leave
your baby with a sitter, you call
home 5 times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk
out the door, you remember to
leave a number where you can
be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions
for the sitter to call only if she
sees blood.